I have heard that the counter to Las Vegas wedding is a “Mexican divorce”.  I don’t know if a similar thing applies to a Shanghai wedding. 

We went to our first Chinese wedding last night.  My executive admin was getting married for the first time.  I say that because in north China an evening wedding would signify a second marriage, but in Shanghai, evening affairs are preferred.  

The invitation had a wedding time of 5:18 PM – the 8 is for luck.  We arrived on time to a radiant bride and beaming groom.  The guests continued to arrive for about an hour as the couple greeted them, take a picture with each and the guests pay their “entrance fee” to the banquet – in other word, handing over of the hongbao (红包)(red pocket) full of cash as a gift. 

We were seated at a prime table with the other laowai (老外) (foreigners) from my office.  The table was set with drinks and cigarettes for the guests.   The wine label read: “Red Wine for Joyful Occasions” – I thought red wine made ALL occasions joyful!.  I love the Double Happiness smokes – guess lung cancer is not a concern.

 

One of the experiences of a Chinese wedding banquet is the food.   As we waited for all the guests to arrive, a series of cold dishes were put on the table.  Included was shredded jelly fish (which Brenda thought were noodles – taking a big bite), duck tongue, and dried salted fish.

   

                 Duck Toungue                                   Dried Fish

As a group of laowai, we did not know the etiquette so we started eating the cold dishes until we noticed no one else was. One of my Chinese colleagues then explained drinking was encouraged, but we had to wait to eat.

 

After the couple made their grand entrance, swapped vows on stage (of course everything was in Chinese – we just followed the crowd when it came to clapping), did a quick cake cut amidst spewing bubbles and poured pink champagne down the stack of glasses, it was time to eat.

Talk about a culinary adventure.  From the aforementioned cold dishes, we went on a journey that included the following (I am glad the menu has pictures!):

 

         Turtle Sticky Rice                            Deep Fried Snake

 
                                   Roasted Pigeon

Not pictured but honorable mentions: Steamed Fish, Prawns, Pork and Dumplings 

Brenda was on the adventurous side of the table.  She ate snake (tastes like chicken, just lots of small bones), Pigeon (taste like chicken, only smaller and gamier), turtle rice (tastes like rice with chicken chunks and turtle shell bits to spit out) but duck tongue is where she drew the line. 

After a few more rounds of food, two large pieces of wedding cake were placed on the table.  Brenda scanned the table of ten and wondered what the rest of them were going to have for dessert.  Try eating wedding cake with chop sticks – very amusing.

The bride ran off again and put on her traditional red dress.  The couple then reappeared on stage, where gifts with the parents were exchanged and the couple conducted a “lucky draw” for the guests.  The lucky draw was done by cycling through the entrance picture of all the guests on a big screen and the bride saying “stop”.  The “winner” had to come up on stage and give a performance to receive their prize.  None of us knew what they received as a lucky draw prize.  In reality, we were the lucky ones not getting selected to sing a Chinese song in front of total strangers.

The couple then made rounds to all the tables for a table by table toast.  This signified the end.  Many tables performed one by one toasts with the couple intent on getting them drunk.  As laowai, we were not knowledgeable about the practice, so we let the couple off with a single toast for the whole table. 

We ended the evening in fine shape.  Well fed, enough cocktails and very full of the new experience.  I find the more I am in China, the more Chinese and Western culture are the same, just in a different priority order.